Friday, November 28, 2008

AMONG THE MULTITUDE

Among the men and women, the multitude,
I perceive one picking me out by secret and divine signs,
Acknowledging none else,
Not parent, wife, husband, brother, child, any nearer than I am,
Some are baffled, but that one is not--that one knows me.
Ah lover and my divine and perfect equal,
I meant that you should discover me so by faint indirections,
And I, when I meet you, mean to discover you by the like in you.

Did you just.....??

"Did you say you love me?"
You who verses in ciphers
In the petite pieces you sketch
And the solitary breaths you seize
Painted with arid sighs amidst.
A while ago when you curved them
As we said, "See you soon...",
And began walking our ways;
I caught that mist in your eyes.
Oh Yes! I did.
The fervent beam and that tiny dent,
Yes, I could see.
And then perhaps you whispered,
More like a placid zephyr.
I discern not but I believe I heard so,
Or did I, for I craved to, now too.
I yearn if only I could pose it to you,
Tell me, I pray...
"Did u just utter? You love me?"

Soulmate

Every withheld tear of your secret sorrow,
Every aspiration shattered, scattered
Each scarlet drop draining your bruised heart
Each word, nay letter, of your stifled voice
Fires my dormant spirit
Oh soul infinite
Come share with me my courage, my strength,
My inspiration, my very breath
That in blessed companionship
We may traverse as one
This craggy terrain called life
Until eventide sneaks up on us.

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Dementia

Imagine your self trapped inside an immobile body with eyes open that can see but can’t move, blink or cry. Inside your head you hear your cries telling the world that you are inside the body, feeling the pain, the cold and the scalpel. Just imagine...

Tell me about the opaque black mirrors
of exotic nights full of psychotics dreams,
when we want to wake up from lethargy
that chained us to the dungeon’s wall,
where silence howls like tortured souls
suffering seventy thousand deaths
without having been born just once.
Tell me yesterday, not tomorrow,
because today I am deaf reading
in the shadow of a burn out candle
while silence are shouting inside,
like a tortured prisoner tries
to escape the cruellest hands
that wants to stop his last breath.
Tell me only the truth, trough lies,
because I can’t be a believer no more
in a world full of complacent wardens
and cobblestones singing marches
under the boots of bellicose soldiers
praising the tyrant’s silver coins
in the witches’ hour of the innocent’s night.
Tell me, you betrayed your brother
because gold had a better colour,
and not for the sake of a piece of bread,
he believed in you, as did you father,
and the womb that carried your blood
so after your birth you become a man
that make them to listen when you talk.
Tell me that your winter heart will pass
because we can’t live without a little hope,
that butterflies will be tomorrow
when the barren earth hit by the sun
gives us the desert warmth of the day
after a night of hands pressing hunger,
you was the one making the wrong choice.
Tell me every minute of your eternity,
because I will need to hear that my dead
was no something you expected tomorrow
when it was today not yesterday,
announced by the flapping wings,
without knowing its was also dead, of a hawk,
that feed itself from the carrion of your heart.
Tell me yesterday, don’t do it tomorrow,
because I will be not here today.

Hues of Love

There was no beginning for I felt to begin would only hurt me. So I stay in my own mind. You have given me feelings I cannot contain nor know what to do with now. I am lost in an ocean of thoughts of you and the softness of your eyes as they gaze at me and draw me in deeper into feelings and desires I never shared with anyone before.
For to fulfil your desires and share my heart And love with you would be a joining so strong that one could alter. I have much to offer but have not shared with anyone. You have givenme hope. Hope of a better tomorrow. Hope of a true and lasting love with someone that knows what love is truly about.
Touching is love. Sharing is love. A special look, a feeling as one is looked at is love. There is no one way to love for we are all different. I want an open love. One that I don’t have to be afraid to speak of my love and not be laughed at because of my feelings.
Your words are my redemption for you have truly opened a door long closed to all. I have hidden in my own shell. Not sharing my true self with anyone as I have shared with you. I am at peace because my heart is opening up after years of sorrow and looking up and out into the sunshine once again.
A tenderness that has long been forgotten by me for it was never accepted. A heart that was broken and a soul that turned away from all the good in the world. To me kindness, tenderness and love were just words used to slay me and draw me deeper into Sadness. But now---I feel a new beginning that will never end.

No end to what I can feel deep within myself and share with you. Now I don’t have to be Afraid of my heart and finally can say what I have had bottled up for years. You have drawn on my heartstrings and pulled me back from all sorrow into a world bright with love and sensitivity.

Behind These Hazel Eyes

Seems like just yesterday
You were a part of me
I used to stand so tall
I used to be so strong
Your arms around me tight
Everything, it felt so right
Unbreakable, like nothing could go wrong
Now I can't breathe
No, I can't sleep
I'm barely hanging on...
Here I am, once again
I'm torn into pieces
Can't deny it, can't pretend
Just thought you were the one
Broken up, deep inside
But you won't get to see the tears I cry
Behind these hazel eyes...
I told you everything
Opened up and let you in
You made me feel alright
For once in my life
Now all that's left of me
Is what I pretend to be
So together, but so broken up inside...
Swallow me then spit me out
For hating you, I blame myself
Not seeing you it kills me now
No, I don't cry on the outside
Anymore...Coz here I am, once again
I'm torn into pieces
Can't deny it, can't pretend
Just know that you are still the one
Broken up, deep inside...
My hopes to be with you I keep alive
But you won't get to see the tears I cry
Behind these hazel eyes...

"Because Of You"

I will not make the same mistakes that you did
I will not let myself
Cause my heart so much misery
I will not break the way you did,
You fell so hard
I've learned the hard way
To never let it get that far...
Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid...
I lose my way
And it's not too long before you point it out
I cannot cry
Because I know that's weakness in your eyes
I'm forced to fake
A smile, a laugh everyday of my life
My heart can't possibly break
When it wasn't even whole to start with...
I watched you go away
You never heard me cry every night in my sleep
I was so young
You should have known better than to blame me
You never thought of anyone else
You just saw your pain
And now I cry in the middle of the night
For the same damn thing...
Because of you
I try my hardest just to forget everything
Because of you
I don't know how to let anyone else in
Because of you
I'm ashamed of my life because it's empty
Because of you
There is a vacuum in my heart only to be filled by you...
Because of you
I am not me
Because of you
Because of you...