Saturday, January 31, 2009

An abstract search

Crazed in disbelief of my own decisions
Made out of simple design:
An action to create reaction
Hands reach out blindly in abstract search
Any destination at all the desire
And companion for the misery of indecision
So seeks the blind explorer
A short relief for boredom,
A random source of experience
And with each experiment
Comes a result less fortunate
That in abstraction,
The only answer is confusion...


Why such a burden, fate

Wish for a simpler cause
To escape this painful clench
Tightened jaw, so unwilling
Too unfortunate to accept
Such a fate graciously.
The noise becomes enough
So that hands must interfere
To drown and throttle the gift
And all it threatens to give

Why such a burden, fate?
And with it such injury
As those who run through walls,
Ignoring open doors,
Regret time lost to disbelief,
The suffering of struggle,
And the foolish presumption
That one must climb a mountain backwards...
To appreciate the view.


No esteem but selfless

It’s a crisis
When a diamond looks to dirt for affection
When a genius seeks guidance from the stupid
For the blind to lead the visionary
Perfume gazing with love and longing
At a toilet.

Once a man held his arm out to me
In his hand, a penny
A statement of my worth
For I should be so grateful
As to have a man offer any sum of trash
To collect me.

No esteem held high enough
To silence the weeping heart of a neglected child
She, we each house inside ourselves, molested
But let her cry not
For safety is in strangers with nourishing candy
To make us all feel
So very much better.

Killing time...

Two lights that burn inside grown dim
My own gutters in its boredom
And one so uninspired
Sees the world as truly blank
The nothing spans farther than I could ever aspire
And so, my goal transforms
To reach the end of oblivion
It’s true, I know of no purpose
I have let go the romantic ideal of my solo plight
Through the big, big universe
It is not I versus anything
But I begging for scraps, and a warm place to rest
So befuddle me with minor preoccupations
And find me some place
To feel closer to sanctimony,
Not merely my atoms flying
Exhausted through the daily futile.
There must be a better way to
Kill time between now and forever.

Devotion

They, confused and broken,
Are sent to me in disrepair
To seek my accidental guidance
And though none for me, my hand opens
To lead and presage what's heard through touch

Questions cried by lost children
Under breathe of pretence and posture
He may stand before me tall and impressive
But in him, I see truth longing to express fealty

This pretence exhausts us both
As I must endure such an unskilled performance
And he, nervous that in the end, I will not applaud

My child, be comforted
That though I see you as you truly are,
So stands with me a man I truly love...

I am this battle

I am this battle
I am the tortured corporal
Fought behind a fettered front
Battered through, done no good
Shot in the head, in the temple
Wept and soaked like a goat on the altar
Salty red preservation, sordid on a past

I am to untie the knots, the spiller of seeds
Drive out those bats, for the vampires be crazy!
I will trap them in the salty red, suckered sweetly
Menu for those wicked passed on fire of a mortar
Throughout unbidden, with sorrels for their safety
Pickled and seasoned, queued up and waiting

I am the binder of undue
Tacked onto the back cavalry
Patched through, done no good
Height there on a wing left swaying
Fist waving on the right hand saying
Sky is not falling! It broods blue

Charged to the altar with grief to land
Of the sound forest falls, while one hand stands
Front dances forth and back like fire
Burning on, uncontained like theory
I am the cold, blue flame.


The Valkyries



I WILL NOT LIVE THIS LIFE IN DISGUISE
I WILL NOT SUFFER FILTERS AND APOLOGY
BRING YOUR BATTLES AND CHALLENGES
AND I WILL FIGHT WITH JOY FOR THIS FREEDOM
THE FREEDOM TO LOVE ABSOLUTELY…

The Valkyrie is, in the oldest strata of belief, a corpse goddess, represented by the carrion-eating raven. The name in Old Norse, valkyrja, means literally, "chooser of the slain." The Valkyrie is related to the Celtic warrior-goddess, the Morrigan, who likewise may assume the form of the raven. The Valkyries ("Choosers of the Slain") are beautiful young women, mounted upon winged horses and armed with helmets and spears. The Valkyries rode through the air in brilliant armour, directed battles, distributed death lots among the warriors, and conducted the souls of slain heroes to Valhalla, the great hall of Odinn.

By this later time, the Valkyries, as demigoddesses of death, had their legend conflated with the folklore motif of the swan maiden (young girls who are able to take on the form of a swan, sometimes as the result of a curse). If one could capture and hold a swan maiden, or her feathered cloak, one could extract a wish from her. This is why valkyries were sometimes known as swan maidens or wish maidens. They are prone to leaving their husbands and seeking out battle again, which is their old homes.

Although the sources consulted are not clear on this, the chief of the Valkyries seems to have been the goddess Freyja. She is the Norse goddess of love, fertility, and beauty, sometimes identified as the goddess of battle and death. Blond, blue-eyed, and beautiful, Freyja travels on a golden-bristled boar or in a chariot drawn by cats. She resides in the celestial realm of Folkvang. Like Odinn, she received half of those slain in battle, but since ladies go first she was allowed first choice! Freyja possessed a magical cloak of falcon feathers that allowed her to take the shape of a falcon if she wished, making the swan maidens similar to the goddess by having "feather coats" or cloaks that enable their shape-shifting abilities and the power of flight.

The Valkyries carry out the will of Odinn in determining the victors of the battle, and the course of the war. Their primary duty is to choose the bravest of those who have been slain, gathering the souls of dying heroes or warriors found deserving of afterlife in Valhalla. They scout the battle ground in search of mortals worthy of the grand hall. If you are deemed by the Valkyries as un-worthy of the hall of Valhalla you will be received after death by the goddess Hel in a cheerless underground world.

They apportion victory in battle according to Odinn's commands, and scour the battlefields for those who are particularly brave, or show particular skill in the arts of combat. The bravest warrior was he who ran head and heart first into the violence, seeking to conquer an opponent not in fearful self-preservation, but so that another challenge may be faced. He fought with full expectation of being slain, but fought with every atom of his being, for there is no greater joy for the brave than giving everything for what he believes. And if any adversity can conquer the heart and strength of such a powerful force, one who has nothing to lose and everything to gain by exposing his weakness and inviting pain, he will know that he has died gloriously in his love and conviction, and without regret. In truth, he was not conquered at all, for nothing can defeat a fearless heart. When such warriors die, the valkyries then carry them over Bifrost, the rainbow bridge, and to Valhalla. Once in Valhalla they also serve the slain warriors meat and drink. (This should not at all be seen as a servile role, rather just the opposite. Sometimes in Viking society a queen would serve a particularly honoured guest herself, as a sign of great respect, and it is in this sense that the valkyries serve the Einherjar who feast there.)

The descriptions of Odinn's hall describe the Valkyries as foster-daughters, just as the einherjar (the chosen warriors of Odinn) are foster sons Freyja is said to be the first of the Valkyries, called Valfreyja, "Mistress of the Slain," she pours ale at the feasts of the Aesir . The Valkyries also have duties in the great hall. There, having exchanged their armour for pure white robes, they will serve the warriors they have chosen. Another function the valkyries serve in Valhalla is to guide the warriors in their battle-training, and to heal and/or reanimate them after a day of battle-practice. They also give warnings of battle via dreams and visions, and also of impending death.
Sometimes, the Valkyrie guides and protects her chosen human, and may become his lover. She teaches him the ways of Odinn, and brings him wisdom and inspiration from the god, and when the time comes she kills him and brings him home. So that he may celebrate true love in his own skin.

Valhalla, the great hall of slain warriors is located in Asguard, the realm of Odinn. It contains 540 doors each of which leads to a room which can accommodate 800 warriors. The roof is made of warrior's shields. There the warriors spend their days fighting and their nights feasting, until Ragnarok, the day of the final world battle, in which the old gods will perish and a new reign of peace and love will be instituted.
The Valkyries are connected with the legend of the Raven Banner. This banner was woven of the cleanest and whitest silk and no picture of any figure was found upon it except in the case of war, at which time a raven always appeared upon it, as if woven into it. If the Danes were going to win the upcoming battle, the raven appeared with his beak wide open, flapping its wings and restless on its feet. If they were going to be defeated, the raven did not stir at all, and its limbs hung motionless. Sometimes the blood-covered Valkyrie-prophetesses are seen themselves as weavers, to prophesy the outcome of the next day's battle.

The Valkyries are also Odinn's messengers and when they ride forth on their errands, their armour causes the strange flickering light that is called the "Aurora Borealis" (Northern Lights). When the Northern Lights were in the sky, ancestors said that it was caused by the light reflected from the shields the Valkyries were beating their swords against.
Any maiden who becomes a valkyrie will remain immortal and invulnerable as long as they obey the gods and remain virginal. It is often said that if you see a Valkyrie before a battle, you will die in that battlle.